Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
