Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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