i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
how does that bad decision feel?
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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