He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
