People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
