Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
It was confusing and full of hummus
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
The air was thick with penises
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
