My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
even my farts smell like vagina
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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