I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
