did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
