I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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