We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
my liver is dry heaving
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
