3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Randomize
