I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize
