you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Randomize
