i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
