Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Randomize
