Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Randomize
