omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
as a side note pls kill me
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
