I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
