I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
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