We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
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