I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
