I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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