Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
