Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
