Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
is wine microwaveable?
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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