yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
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