we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
