My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
smell my finger.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Randomize
