this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
