A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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