do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
PANTIES FOUND
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
