i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize