It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Randomize