Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
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