I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize