I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize
