i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
