duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Found the puke drawer
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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