I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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