what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
