CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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