Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Acid is not a monday night drug
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
