Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
You were trust falling into bushes
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize