WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
