Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
