i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
