why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
i think i have herpe
just one?
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
