Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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