Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Randomize
