is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I FOUND THE LEGS
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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