garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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